Paul is our New Saviour!

So now that the world has witnessed the immense power of Paul the Octopus we all need to ask ourselves: is any other religion necessary anymore?

The numbers six and seven have been rendered obsolete, eight is the new black! It was eight predictions – one for each of his puckered suckers – that proved to all of us that he is the One. The Spanish are already worshipping him, so now it’s time for all of us to follow suit and bow down before this incredible and holy psychic power.

So what if he only has another year to live? Chop him up, batter and deep fry his body, he will surely rise again from within the pits of our stomachs or maybe even be born again in each one of us!

Throw down your burkas and your Bibles; forget Scientology and star signs; Paul is our new Saviour!