As if a KFC snackbox wasn’t nauseating enough, the other day I came across a bottle of Parlotones wine. It was rose’, a wine much like their music – produced to appeal to the largest slice of an undiscerning demographic.
The week before at the cinema I was subjected to a 3D music video by none other than the Parlotones – an Olympian leap onto an already groaning bandwagon.
(Honestly, what’s next, 3D Antiques Roadshow?)
And the week before that, in the esteemed publication Heat (SA’s only weekly glossy), I couldn’t help feeling my bowels quake at the sight of a sidebar laughing at a new shoe on the market complete with a little Parlotones logo stitched into the side. The header was something droll – “Step into the Parlotones’ shoes”.
Now I’ll be honest, I’m not a fan. Even though I bought a Parlotones cd the other month for R80 I haven’t got past the first thirty seconds of the opening track because it’s just so annoying – the kind of wimpy commercial rock that could only appeal to upper-middle class white girls from Herschel. And I have to admit I fucking hate the Clockwork Orange eyeliner. So this is clearly not an objective opinion, but I don’t think anyone could reasonably disagree with the statement that the Parlotones are massive sell-outs.
(Upon writing, it has been brought to my attention a limited edition {only 5 million produced} Parlotones laptop is available… for fuck’s sake!)
Then I got to thinking about the fine line between art and commercially-produced stool-samples, its success based purely on the scope of appeal. Are television ads for McDonald’s or Mr Price modelling shoots considered art?
And then I got to thinking that maybe the Parlotones don’t consider themselves artists at all but merely entertainers or more specifically a brand. If they are only, unashamedly, in it for the money then is there anything wrong with branding their logo on anything from Pick ‘n Pay milkshakes to kwaai hubcaps?
Not at all, I suppose, as long as they don’t expect us to regard them as anything more than whores willing to sell themselves to the highest bidder.
And still then I got to thinking that if it was me being offered large sums of money to promote KFC or some shoe company would I turn it down or would I sell my creativity to the Devil (because make no mistake, Colonel Sanders is the Antichrist) (and make no further mistake, your creativity is your soul)?
I would love to say of course I wouldn’t be such a hack, but how could I know unless I’ve been in that situation?
I suppose that even rock stars need you eat – man cannot live on barely-legal groupie-sex alone – so maybe getting a fast food company to sponsor species-36 burgers for life or a clothing manufacturer making sure you don’t run around like a rural farm kid for a year or so isn’t that bad. Who am I to judge?
It might lose them respect, but I’m sure it gets them paid and laid.
However, I can’t help thinking that in the long run it’s a bad idea, because when the tennis-tekkies are worn out and the fingers licked clean what will they have left?
So cheers to the Parlotones’ no doubt forthcoming Christmas album – who needs credibility when you’ve got money?
Perhaps it is a marvelous thing that as an aspiring writer it has been blatantly evident that you will never have to deal with decisions about your fame. It takes talent to become famous, and appeal to masses of people. Maybe if you could deal with your anger issues it would increase your success as a critic. That aside, it might be interesting to note that most bands find it very expensive to tour, especially a band from South Africa that has to deal with the enormous expense of traveling to countries far away while handling the weak Rand vs all other currencies. If it comes down to staying home and never marketing your fame or utilizing the opportunities presented to you to fill a niche market and thereby having the funds to travel and share your music with people around the world that love you and want to see you, what sensible human would choose to stay home and stay insular? Face reality, my dear Mr. Casey, and accept the fact that people are going to purchase products because they can do so and because they want to do so. There is nothing wrong with giving them something that they are happy with and feel proud to own because it reminds them of people who have given them joy and filled their lives with the beauty of music. I have nothing to gain from the Parlotones marketing, as I am a mere fan. I just wanted to explain to you that those of us who live in other countries far away from yours are extremely proud of the Parlotones and the enormous effort they have gone to to come to our countries and meet us and sing to us the beautiful songs that they have. If selling products with their name on them makes that happen, then I will be the first in a line that will comprise of millions of fans that will purchase something to make it possible for them to come to us again. Even Jesus was unwelcome in his own country, by his own people. Naysayers have always been around, I am just sorry to see that someone has given one the opportunity to publish this type of drivel for the world to see. Thank you for your article, it makes me realize just how truly famous the Parlotones are becoming that they could engender such vitrolic jealousy.
ReplyDeleteI have been around music for 25 years. Toured with National Acts, produced, managed and seen all sides of the music business. The Parlotones are where they are due to raw talent, first and hard work second. To be a musician and finally receive recognition for your art is not only rewarding but incredible. In the day of here today gone tomorrow musicians, it is truly a blessing to have a band such as The Parlotones touring the world. The fact that four boys were able to make magic with their music and conquer so many adoring fans from all Nations around the world is only due to their extreme work ethic and a front man that can grace a stage like no other, I've seen in many, many years. Funny you sound like a typical jaded musician. One who thinks they can either sing or write and just feels they were over looked or not appreciated for their true talent. When the truth of it is you were probably to damn lazy to get off your duff and go from city to city without a cent in return. Being a WORKING band is one of the most extreme "Jobs" you can have. Loss of family, friends and a constant battle to continue to re-make yourself with every new song. If the Parlotones are finally getting rewarded for that hard work, then more power to them. I mean really, whats the point in being an artist if no one recognises your talent? If no recognises you then maybe, your simply not that good. Those who can't do, knock those that can. I am a fan and one who chooses to help support these boys because they are pure talent. I am proud to know them, will tell the world about them and hope to watch them receive a grammy one day in the USA. By the way their first song on their new album is very easy to get through. Tune into any radio station in the world and you and millions of others will hear it all 4:12 seconds of it just as we did when they opened for Shakira at The World Cup Kick Off Concert in front of billions of viewers! Let me know when you write one better than Push Me To The Floor, I would love to hear it.
ReplyDeleteLorraine McCarthy
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